THE US REPORT

Commentary by Chris Carter

While covering global warming, the latest ACORN scandal, or another abomination of the Justice Department is essential to the survival of our republic, the holiday season (Christmas-time here in the “Heartland”) provides the staff of the US Report a brief but necessary respite from what could eventually drive us to jump off a bridge. Therefore, in the spirit of Christmas (and sanity) I thought it appropriate to relate the firehouse Christmas experience.

I grew up in a firehouse. My father worked as a fireman, and although that meant a lot of time – and Christmases – without Dad, it was still an awesome gig. Climbing around on firetrucks, sliding down poles, knowing that Dad was ripping people from the clutches of death was all pretty cool. So cool in fact, that I decided to follow in his footsteps.  I joined the first fire department that would hire me.

Christmas at the Jacksonville Landing in Florida. [Photo by Kay B. Day)

No one wants to be away from his family on Christmas. But if one must be away from family on Christmas, there are few better places to suffer than the firehouse. Apart from the normal fire and rescue calls, our Christmas schedule consists of “eat 'till you're tired and sleep 'til you're hungry.” To assist us in our holiday routine, local businesses will often send fruit baskets, sandwich trays, fried chicken, cookies, and other tasty morsels to fulfill our eating requirements. A steady diet of football games and History Channel will then assist us on our way to a turkey-induced coma.

Soldiers and firemen are two of the top video game-playing demographics in America, and since many firemen are also veterans, a friendly game of football or Navy SEALs death match is not an unfamiliar sight. Being paid to play video games is a dream-come-true for many little boys.

The naps and video games will no doubt be interrupted by visiting families. Young children (and possibly a few future firemen) show off their favorite presents to the other firemen – or “fire friends” as my children call them. To finish off the evening, we gather in the truck room to enjoy a cigar and talk about “the good old days.”

The down side is that any time the fire department shows up on Christmas, it's not a good thing. For just one day, even the adrenaline junkies on the department hope the radio stays silent. Unfortunately, there is almost always a house fire on – or just before – Christmas. Candles may provide great aromatherapy, but if you're going to burn them, remember the first rule of real estate: location, location, location!

It is always heartbreaking when a family loses everything, but it is even worse when the fire gets to the family's Christmas presents before we can.

Over all, it's not too bad a deal. But if you do work Christmas, you know that the staff officers are all home with their families, and won't be around to make your life miserable.

Merry Christmas from us here at The US Report, and let's not forget who are on the front lines of keeping us safe,   the men and women of the Armed Forces. An extra nod to those who have served or who are currently serving overseas.